Here on the blog I enjoy writing about frugal living and saving money. But today I want to talk about frugality from a little different angle. Because there are times when being frugal goes too far.
Yes, I actually said that. 😉
I grew up learning to be frugal from my parents. Even when they had money to spare they were always very careful with it. We rarely ate out (like, a couple times a year) and didn’t spend money on many extras.
I got a regular job when I was fifteen and socked away all my money for college. I rarely spent on anything besides necessary clothes, etc.
When Pablo and I got married I quickly realized that he and I didn’t always have the same approach to money (though he was certainly still careful with it.) For example, when we stopped for fast food he ordered a regular combo instead of something from the value menu. I know you’re laughing, but at the time that bothered frugal little me.
Anyway, over the last few years I’ve learned that while frugality is important, there are times when being frugal can go too far (and I’m thankful for a husband who has helped to balance me out a bit!)
So, let’s talk about some of the times when you actually shouldn’t be so frugal.
When Being Frugal Goes Too Far
1. When the quality is even cheaper than the cheap price
You shouldn’t always buy the cheapest item. In fact, it’s not always the most frugal thing to do.
For example, I like to buy a lot of my kids’ clothes second hand. You can often find really great deals at consignment stores like Kid-to-Kid and Once Upon a Child.
However, I’ve realized that for some things it just makes sense to pay a bit more and buy them new – like jeans for my active five year old (because he’ll wear holes through the knees of used jeans within a week!)
The same goes for clothes for me. Although I still enjoy shopping second hand when I’m able, I’ve been paying more attention to the quality of the clothes recently. It’s better to pay a little more for something that will last several years than to grab the cheapest thing that will pill after the first wash.
2. When you waste a lot of valuable time
I make an effort to save money on groceries and one thing I do every week is check the store ads to see what’s on sale.
However, when the sales I like are at three different stores, I often have to choose just one of the stores to shop at, simply because I don’t have time for them all.
It’s important to remember that time is money too.
It’s not worth my time to regularly stop at three different stores for groceries. If I have the time and freedom I’ll absolutely go to a couple stores to save money, but that’s not often the case, especially with kids in tow.
3. When you turn into “that” customer
If you’ve worked in fast food or retail you know who “that” customer is. The one who argues with you about the price, doesn’t understand why their coupon isn’t giving them the discount they expected, etc. Well, I have a vivid memory of being “that” customer once!
We took the kids to Baskin Robbins a couple years ago and the coupon I brought didn’t ring up properly (or at least I didn’t think it did!) We were charged a couple bucks more than I expected and I questioned the cashier a couple times and complained about it . . . and ended up embarrassing my husband a bit I think.
He reminded me afterwards that it was only a couple bucks – really not a big deal – and since then I’ve thought back to that time when I’ve been tempted to make a fuss about something truly insignificant.
4. When you and your spouse disagree
It’s inevitable – at some point or another you’re going to disagree with your spouse about a purchase. We all come into marriage with certain ways that we are used to doing things and certain expectations when it comes to our spending.
To give you another silly personal example, I always pack food for trips. I make sandwiches ahead of time and pack some fun snacks. I never buy anything at gas stations because in my opinion they’re way overpriced.
Pablo loves that I pack stuff for trips, but no matter how much I pack, he still typically buys something when we stop at a gas station. When we first got married I felt offended, like why was he buying an overpriced drink or snack when I’d already packed some things?
But then I realized that for him, that’s part of the fun of the trip – splurging a little bit – just like for me part of the fun is preparing everything ahead of time. I could either freak out about the extra three bucks that we spent, or I could accept that he is not me and go with it . . . and maybe even ask him to grab me something too. 😉
While that’s just a silly example, the point is that in marriage it shouldn’t be “my way or the highway.” Whether it’s something as little as a snack at the gas station or something more significant (new furniture instead of second hand, etc.) if a certain purchase is important to your spouse, try to see it from their perspective, even if it pains your frugal heart a little bit.
5. When you don’t actually need that amazing deal
This probably goes without saying, but while you may feel super frugal when you buy something for 80% off, if you don’t actually need it, don’t buy it.
In fact, one of the best ways to save money and stick to your budget is to simply shop less. I know, I know, it kills me not to capitalize on a good deal, but guess what, if you don’t need it, it’s not a good deal.
I’m sure there are more times when being frugal goes too far, but those are the five I thought of!
Now I want to hear from you: Have you had a time where you were probably too frugal? Are you typically a spender or a saver? Let’s chat in the comments!
I absolutely agree. I blog about personal finance and there are times when being frugal simply goes too far, like foregoing nutritious food for cheap junk food. This is a great post, thanks for sharing.
Ooh that’s a good point about food! Cheap does not mean better if you’re choosing junk food.
This list is like reading my mail! I grew up in an ultra frugal home and learned the hard way to loosen the clutches on the wallet., thanks to my husband and our loving Lord and a very giving friend.
As to number 5. I learned that one only a few years ago from my dear sister. We were shopping at a “cheap” store and I found a blouse at an amazing price, and was prepared to buy when my dear sister asked if I needed a blouse like that. “No”, I replied, “but it’s such a deal!” She replied, “Just because it is there and you have the money doesn’t mean you should buy it!” The Holy Spirit really used that comment to pierce me with truth.
After years of thinking of hopping to different stores, I decided we just would shop at 1 place. I didnt have the time or energy for more.
I decided I’d pick of all the stores, saying, “Which store is consistently low priced for our overall everything?” It was obvious, and I usually go to that one store now. We do have another store we buy at, for one item, maybe about every month or two.
One time recently, I embarrassed my husband and extended family at a restaurant, by complaining.
Boy, I know how you feel. I sure hope and pray that I could make that right, sometime.
I wanted to be a nutritionist as a kid.
I love to feed people, and I like to give people a tasty meal. I like to see them enjoy 2nds and thirds.
I like to know they havent left the table hungry.
With me, I’d rather cook filling foods, along with vegetables (or fruit) and meat (or complete protein). I try to have potatoes, noodles, or bready foods at all meals, and at least once a day. For example, breakfast could be cooked oatmeal with raisins and milk.
That nutritious break-fast (breaking our nightly fast !) could also have toast and orange juice, so no one goes away hungry.
Potatoes, noodles, and breads help me to give a hearty meal to each one eating.
Those foods are also cheap !
Spaghetti noodles have meat sauce, and a salad. Butter bread or french bread goes with it.
Chicken with potatoes and a veggie – or two – is good…or instead of one of the veggies, have rolls.
These ideas may help someone. A bag of potatoes, or a bag or noodles, doesnt cost much. Breads can be made homemade, when you have time, but breads are very cheap at the store, if you shop wisely. That will work, for when you cant cook your bread. When you plan the day, a loaf of bread made first thing in the morning, will give the family food for the whole day.
Enjoy a soup or stew, with cornbread and milk.
If the kids or husband don’t like that meal, i’d avoid cooking or serving it…
– or, have plenty of other foods on the table that provide enough nutrients to keep each one healthy.
Thanks for listening !
Mrs G, thanks so much for all the tips! I love cooking for people too, especially when they enjoy the food. I definitely agree that breads, pastas, and potatoes are all inexpensive and an easy way to make a meal more filling. My kids are always happy to eat more bread haha!
Miss Joan, thanks for commenting! Thank God for husbands who help to balance us out! Regarding what you learned from your friend, I’ve slowly been learning the same. If you don’t need it, don’t get it, no matter what a great “deal” it is.